First year college students on the Autism/Asperger’s spectrum often face difficulties adjusting to their new lives. Getting along with others and making friends can be a challenge. Negotiating college bureaucracy can be an issue. Dealing with professors who may or may not be willing to make necessary accommodations can be challenging. Coping with a new space and environment with all of it’s sensory input and different space can be problematic. Many students even have difficulty dealing with the bureaucracy dealing with college disability offices!
So what’s to be done? First, make sure you’re in contact with the college and the disability office before your student begins, and figure out what accommodations must be made. Take your student to visit the campus beforehand. Help them figure out where classes will take place and practice finding the proper rooms and buildings.
Now these suggestions are all well and good, but eventually parents will have to let go and let their student begin to deal with these issues on their own. So, what’s to be done? If at all possible, let your child begin to take on more and more responsibility in high-school. This can be something as simple as getting a part-time job, beginning to let your student “sink or swim” more often, and then process afterwards what worked and what didn’t in order to achieve their goal.
Once at college, parents need to let go as much as possible. Your student most likely is a legal adult by now and parents’ input can oftentimes feel like “interference” to college advisors and set you at odds with the system. Teaching the student ways to regulate emotion is key. Also, having your student if possible advocate for themselves in finding the right accommodations. If possible allowing for time-outs during classes if necessary, and of course extended test-taking time in a separate room (although this isn’t always the only answer). Remember the college is not obligated to make any accommodations beyond those that are “reasonable”. Reasonable can vary from school to school and from instructor to instructor. Again early preparation, emotional regulations skills, and early exposure to gradually increasing self-reliance early on can go a long way.